


Never Surrender

by Cat16



Series: Nerve Anna [7]
Category: Nirvana (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Cheating, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Other, Polyamory, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, RPF, Smut, This ain’t sunshine and butterflies, Verbal Abuse, Vomiting, dubious lube, not beta read again
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-08
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 16:01:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29919336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cat16/pseuds/Cat16
Summary: “You’re lying. I know you are.” There was none of the explosive anger now, only quiet seething as Kurt wound her tighter unwittingly. He said nothing and Courtney’s eye twitched slightly. She lashed out suddenly at the back of the couch, hitting it with enough force to make Kurt jerk violently and recoil.“I-““Shut up. Just shut the fuck up, you fucking dick.”
Relationships: Kurt Cobain/Courtney Love, Kurt Cobain/Dave Grohl, Kurt Cobain/Dave Grohl/Krist Novoselic, Kurt Cobain/Krist Novoselic
Series: Nerve Anna [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2091555
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	Never Surrender

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings:  
> \- Verbal Abuse  
> \- Dubious Lube  
> \- I sorta hint at past physical abuse..  
> \- Lots of Swearing

Krist rolled off of Kurt, breath heaving, and sprawled out beside him. Kurt’s chest rose and fell quickly, still coated in sticky white from his orgasm. Krist reached for a cloth on the nightstand and wiped them both relatively clean. He flopped onto his back again, folding his arms over his chest and glancing sideways to see Kurt staring at the ceiling. He copied him and they were silent for several minutes.

“How’s things with Courtney?”

Kurt rasped a laugh.

“Same as ever.”

“Not good, then?” Krist smiled sadly and he felt Kurt shake his head.

“Nope.”

“You and Dave?” That brought a smile to Kurt’s face.

“Good. Really good.” Krist could at least feel some relief at that. “We haven’t all had time together in ages.” And of course by time he meant in each other’s beds every night. Krist hummed in agreement.

“With him out visiting Virginia we’ll have to wait a while.” Kurt grunted. “C’mon. Let’s go get cleaned up.”

“Can I stay here, please?” Kurt turned his gaze to Krist’s face to see pity in his eyes.

“Kurt, you have to go back. Courtney’s going to get suspicious if you keep staying here.”

“I know,” Kurt whispered and Krist got up off the bed, offering Kurt a hand to help him up. He took it and was immediately smothered by Krist’s trademark bear hug. “Can’t breathe!” He choked out dramatically and Krist let him go, grinning broadly and leading the way to the bathroom. He turned the taps on, letting the water fill the bath while he got towels out from under the sink, and Kurt dug around for soap.

Once the bath was full Krist turned it off, lowering himself in and helping Kurt in to sit between his legs. Kurt leant back against his chest, closing his eyes as Krist ran a washcloth over him, rinsing his hair and tracing circles with his fingertips of his left hand, his callouses sending little tingles of bliss through Kurt’s body. He relaxed and rested his head in the crook of Krist’s neck, struggling to stay awake.

Krist felt Kurt’s breathing slow as he drifted to sleep and leaned back slightly, closing his eyes and running is fingers through Kurt’s hair, soaking up this moment because each one felt too close to the last. Or maybe that was just him being scared of losing Kurt.

Krist gave Kurt a final kiss before he got out of the car and walked back up his driveway, slipping in the front door and hoping Courtney was asleep. He crept into the living room and crawled onto the couch, curling up on the trashed fabric of the cushions and closing his eyes.

“Nice of you to come back to your own house.” Kurt looked up at Courtney, standing at the foot of the couch with her arms crossed over her chest. He said nothing. “Well? Are you going to explain yourself?” She snapped and Kurt wrinkled his nose slightly.

“I don’t have to explain myself to you when I haven’t done anything.”

“Yes you do because you’ve been acting strange for months!”

“No.”

“You’re hiding something.” She narrowed her eyes and Kurt’s heart skipped a beat.

“You can’t just accuse me, that’s not fair.”

“What’s _not fair_ is you using your band mates, your _employees_ as fuck-buddies and trying to hide it from me!” She shrieked and Kurt sat up.

“What are you talking about?”

“I know what you’re doing, asshole!”

“I haven’t done anything!” Kurt retorted and Courtney grabbed the armrest of the couch, leaning over it and looking at Kurt’s face, scrutinising him. He could practically see the anger seeping from her pores, face pockmarked still from the heroin, the only sign to Kurt that she didn’t get clean when he did.

“You’re lying. I know you are.” There was none of the explosive anger now, only quiet seething as Kurt wound her tighter unwittingly. He said nothing and Courtney’s eye twitched slightly. She lashed out suddenly at the back of the couch, hitting it with enough force to make Kurt jerk violently and recoil.

“I-“

“Shut up. Just shut the fuck up, you fucking dick,” Courtney hissed and Kurt shut his mouth quickly, teeth clacking together loudly. Courtney whipped around and stormed to her bedroom, leaving Kurt on the couch, hugging his knees and sniffing quietly as tears soaked into the ripped material of his jeans. He tried to breathe evenly but every second breath was sucked in by a sob and he heard Courtney slam the bedroom door shut to block out the noise.

He flinched when the phone rang loudly and slowly got up from the couch, keeping an eye on the bedroom door, watching for Courtney’s return. He picked up the phone and answered quietly.

“Hello?” His voice cracked.

“Kurt! Hey, man! I’ve gotta come home early ‘cos mom’s not well. I’ll probably be back early tomorrow morning. You wanna come over and hang out? Maybe stay the night if you can?” He didn’t seem to notice Kurt’s wavering voice from when he answered.

Kurt regained control over himself now and responded.

“Yeah. That sounds… really good… actually,” Kurt smiled slightly.

“Sweet. I’ll pick you up in the morning?”

“Thanks, Dave.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah.” He had to lie. Courtney was probably listening. “Look- we’ll talk tomorrow.”

“Ok. Bye.” Kurt made a small noise and clicked the phone back into its cradle, shuffling back to the couch and collapsing onto his back, folding his arms over his stomach and letting his mind wander.

He shot up, wandering for a moment why he woke until he heard the timid knocking on his door. He glanced quickly at Courtney’s bedroom. Still shut. He swung his leg over the couch and padded to the door, opening it quietly and putting his forefinger to his lips. Dave took the cue and was silent as Kurt slipped out the door and closed it as silently as possible. He turned to Dave and immediately wrapped his arms around him, pressing his face to Dave’s chest and feeling arms around him in response. He felt like a child. Seeking comfort in Dave’s presence.

Dave sighed into his hair and rubbed circles on his back. Kurt’s breath stuttered and he shook, breathing Dave in and calming himself with the scent of cigarettes and Dave’s cologne. “Hey, it’s ok,” Dave whispered and Kurt hugged him tighter still, balling his fists in Dave’s shirt. Dave’s eyebrows came together with concern. What had she done to him this time?

“Sorry,” Kurt mumbled.

“No, no, you’re fine. C’mon.” He brought his hand to Kurt’s face and brushed the tears from his face with his thumb. Kurt smiled at him, amazed at how one person could drip with so much love for him in just a single moment. He got in the passenger side of the car as Dave opened the door for him. Watching then as he walked around the front of the car to the drivers side and ducked his head as he got in.

He reached across to squeeze Kurt’s thigh comfortingly before he started the car and drove down the street, headed to his hotel in Olympia. Kurt relaxed more the further he got from the hell-hole that was the house with Courtney. The twisted and corrupted life he’s thrown himself into when he thought he was in love. When he thought he knew what it felt like. Before Krist and Dave showed him what it _really_ was like to love and be loved. As dumb and as sappy as it sounded. It made him regret ever even getting out of bed that day. The day Courtney didn’t smile once and he cried and they said ‘I do’.

Oh, the regret. He should’ve waited. Just a few months. A few months and he could’ve been convinced it was a bad idea.

“Kurt?”

“Hm?”

“Do you wanna talk?”

“I don’t know,” he murmured.

“It’s ok. You don’t have to.”

“How about you?” Dave shrugged.

“Yeah. Mom and I just caught up for the most part but she must’ve eaten something.” He scrunched his nose and smiled and Kurt grinned at him.

“Great,” he drawled and Dave nodded.

“Yeah.” He clicked his tongue and pulled into his usual parking spot. They got out of the car and made their way to Dave’s room. Kurt made his way to the kitchen area and opened the fridge, pulling out two beers and tossing one to Dave before cracking his open. “How’s Krist?” Dave asked as they sat down and Kurt bobbed his head.

“Good. I was at his place the other night.” Dave raised an eyebrow.

“Ooh, really?”

“Shut up!” Kurt hit Dave playfully on the shoulder and took a sip of his beer, eyes shining over the top of the can.

“What did you do?” Dave teased and Kurt rolled his eyes dramatically.

“You _really_ wanna know?”

“Are you gonna tell?”

“Don’t answer a question with a question!”

“Yes, then.”

“Well I would tell you… but,” he watched Dave’s face turned exasperated and put his beer on the coffee table, “I think it’d be easier to show you.” He took Dave’s can and placed it beside his own, running his tongue over his dry lips and feeling a pang of self-consciousness as he leaned into Dave and locked their lips, parting his own after a few seconds and encouraging Dave to lick into his mouth.

It quickly turned into Dave pressing down on top of him and tongue-fucking his mouth, groping his cock through his jeans. Kurt moaned lowly into his mouth and bucked his hips up involuntarily as Dave squeezed the tip of his dick. He reached for Dave’s crotch, pulling the zip of his jeans down and undoing the button, slipping his hand down below the waistband of his boxers, fingers massaging his balls.

Dave couldn’t shove Kurt’s pants down fast enough, taking hold of his cock and rubbing his palm over the tip. Kurt whimpered and brushed his tongue against Dave’s, sending a little thrill through them both. Dave forced himself to stop and pull back from the kiss.

“Now what?”

“Use me.”

Dave smirked and crawled up to set his knees either side of Kurt’s head, holding his cock steady and taking Kurt’s jaw in his hand, using his thumb to part his lips. He slipped the head of his cock into Kurt’s mouth, exhaling slowly and closing his eyes for a moment before he gazed down at Kurt. And for perhaps the millionth time, he realised how fucking lucky he was. How lucky he was that Kurt could fucking _look at him_ like that. With his eyes sparkling with love and lust and saliva shining on his lips. How he could look at Dave and convince him in a single moment, even with his throat being fucked raw, that he wanted nothing more than this. Than _them_.

Kurt brought Dave back to the moment, swirling his tongue around his cock. Dave blinked and started moving, feeling a hand come up to his ass, pulling his boxers further down. Dave heard Kurt stroking his own cock in time with the thrusts of his hips into his mouth.

Kurt felt tears spring into his eyes as Dave’s cock hit the back of his throat and fuck if he didn’t love every second of it. Dave kept a steady rhythm fucking into Kurt’s mouth, one hand finding its way into Kurt’s hair and tugging it occasionally. Saliva was dripping down Kurt’s chin and he moaned, eyes sagging shut as his pleasure built, becoming more and more aroused each time Dave sped up.

Dave pulled out suddenly, jerking his cock quickly and flipping his hair back. Kurt stuck his tongue out to catch the spurts as Dave came messily, grunting and biting his lip. He squeezed the last drops from his cock and Kurt swallowed, watching Dave scoot back and line his still-slick cock up with Kurt’s ass.

“You right with this?”

“Fuck yeah.” Kurt kept jerking himself off and his mouth gasped open as Dave pushed in slowly, pulling Kurt’s hips closer and beginning to thrust slowly, glad Kurt was slick enough for him to be enjoying this too, that he was getting off on this just as much as Dave. Kurt’s hand ventured down to where they were joined, feeling Dave’s cock stretching him open. His cock jerked and Dave started really fucking him now.

He thrust hard and fast, making Kurt’s whole body jolt with each and his hand speed up on his cock. He moaned and whimpered, closing his eyes and feeling his orgasm begin. Dave held off his own to watch Kurt come undone beneath him, cum spilling over his knuckles. “Mm- fuck! Dave!” He gasped and Dave thrust faster, determined to finish again before Kurt became overstimulated. It crashed down upon him and his groaning was on the brink of yelling. Kurt felt Dave’s cock spasm inside him before he pulled out, legs turning to jelly. 

His shirt was completely soaked in sweat and he tugged it off to cool his lust and exertion heated skin, while all Kurt could do was lay and drown in the aftershocks of it all. “That was fucking amazing.”

Dave downed the last of his beer after shoving his cock back into his underwear and doing his jeans up. He fell back onto the couch and Kurt managed to regain himself enough to do the same and pull his shirt over his head, still a little self conscious but figuring there was no better way to stop that than face the problem head-on. Dave pushed things around on the coffee table and found the TV remote, pressing the on button and flicking through the channels. “Stop.”

“Hm?”

“Go back.”

Dave flicked back a few channels and stopped on a news report. A woman with a thick Floridian accent came on, a shiny layer of bright red lipstick providing centre focus on the screen as she spoke.

“Brotherly love amongst band mates, Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain and Nirvana drummer Dave Grohl were photographed today at the front of Cobain’s house in Aberdeen, seen sharing the love.” A photo, having been taken from the street, popped up on-screen and Kurt groaned. He was hugging Dave tightly and the photographer had chosen the exact moment Dave kissed the top of his head to snag the photo, tear stains and all.

“Well we’re not gonna hear the end of that.” Dave puffed his cheeks out and Kurt nodded, picking up his beer and making a fake toast to the news reporter before finishing the can. Dave turned the TV back off and felt Kurt crawl up to him, resting his head comfortably on his shoulder. He wrapped an arm around his waist and Kurt sighed, breath tickling Dave’s bare skin. “Kurt?”

“Mm?”

Dave hesitated.

“Never mind.”

“No what were you going to say?”

“No it’s ok. Don’t worry.”

“Dave,” Kurt whined and skimmed his nose up Dave’s jaw until their lips were millimetres apart.

“I love you, Kurt,” Dave breathed, voice cracking as he said it. Kurt was still for several moments and Dave felt his blood run cold. What if that was too much? Kurt was still married for Christ’s sake! Dave just told a _married man_ he loved him!

Kurt lips were on his, fierce and emotional, fingers pulling hard at Dave’s hair. As quick as Kurt had kissed him he pulled away.

“Fuck I’ve wanted to hear that for so long.” Dave’s face broke out into a smile and Kurt nuzzled against him, pressing another soft kiss to his slightly chapped lips and taking a deep breath. Dave pulled Kurt onto his lap, feeling a spark as they joined their lips again, going from powerful and emotion-filled movements to lazy pressing of their lips with the occasional lick or nip before Kurt settled back into Dave’s chest and fell asleep, Dave feeling his breathing, slow and steady, and matched his own to it.

Dave woke to the sounds of hacking coming from his bathroom and stood quickly, pushing open the ajar bathroom door to see Kurt kneeling by the toilet, looking deflated. He gagged again and Dave rushed forward to hold his hair up and out of the way, ignoring the wetness already in his hair. Kurt’s stomach heaved violently and his throat clenched, trying to bring something up from his empty stomach, only succeeding in making Kurt cough up thin saliva, making his throat and nose burn with the acrid smell and taste of stomach acid.

Dave felt sick himself with the smell but stayed with Kurt as he retched helplessly, crumbling down beside the porcelain bowl of the toilet. Dave pulled off some toilet paper and wiped around Kurt’s mouth for him, flushing it down the toilet and crouching down beside the sullen form on the bathroom floor.

“Hey. C’mon, Kurt. Let’s get you cleaned up,” Dave murmured and Kurt shook his head, clutching at his burning, aching stomach.

“Why not?”

“Stop caring so much,” Kurt hissed and Dave blinked in surprise.

“What?”

“Just fuck off, Dave. Leave me alone.”

“I’m just trying to help-“ Dave tried again but Kurt lifted his head enough for Dave to see the pain in his eyes.

“I _said_ , just fuck off.”

“Fine.” Dave’s lips formed a thin line and he stood, leaving Kurt a broken mess on the cold tiles, lighting a frustrated cigarette and cracking the window open so as not to make the smell too obvious for the cleaners. He heard the shower start up some thirty minutes later and crept toward the bathroom door, still half open from when he’d left. Kurt was facing away from him and he turned away, grabbing a glass from the kitchen and filling it with water.

Something was wrong. He didn’t know who or why or how, but he hoped it at least wasn’t him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave some feedback in the form of comments or kudos! <3


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